Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Everyone’s a Critic…Even the More Than Slightly Deranged!


WASHINGTON – A woman accused of pounding on a painting by Paul Gauguin and trying to rip it from a wall at the National Gallery of Art told police the post-Impressionist artist was evil and the painting should be burned, court documents show.

How can a painting be evil?  Even John Wayne Gacy’s work isn’t evil...

…awful?  Sure, but evil?

Susan Burns, 53, of Arlington, Va., has been charged with attempted second-degree theft and destruction of property following the attack Friday.

This broad is 53 years old?  Are you telling me her critique of Gauguin’s painting, "Two Tahitian Women," is the first CRAZINESS she’s exhibited?

(The painting) valued at an estimated $80 million, was not damaged and will go back on view Tuesday, the National Gallery said in a statement. The picture is on loan from the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York for an exhibit titled "Gauguin: Maker of Myth."

This is not Wal-mart honey!  This thing actually has fucking value! 

The painting depicts two women standing next to each other, one with both breasts exposed and the other with one breast showing.  "I feel that Gauguin is evil,” said the batshit crazy bitch, “He has nudity and is bad for the children. He has two women in the painting and it's very homosexual. I was trying to remove it. I think it should be burned."

What child doesn’t love naked women?  Seriously, I’d take a poll if I was allowed anywhere near children. 

And what is she holding?  Pasta?  No one who eats pasta can be bad. 

Burns also said, "I am from the American CIA.  I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you."

This brings me to my advice for the day:  Keep an eye on people using three short declarative sentences in a row...
...and be thankful nobody said "she has nudity"


Jim said...

people named Burns are crazy!

Claire said...

Sue is 53?