Wednesday, November 28, 2012

REPOST from 12/7/10 - Famous Christmas Cards

Originally posted Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Famous Christmas Cards

I found some fun Christmas Cards of a few famous families. It really warms the heart to see such sweet Holiday messages...

"Merry Christmas from North Korea to the North Pole!"
Love, The Kims

"Have a safe and happy holiday!"
The Mansons

"Peace on Earth and Good Will to Man"
Respectfully, The Oswalds

"Someone is getting more than coal in her stocking!"
OJ & Nicole

*You think she'd have seen it coming if she read the card.

and finally...

"He's the reason for the season...wait, he was a WHAT?!?"

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Inappropriate IMs


Nov 06 4:34 PM:

Martha Maher:  Hi Cutie its Jen, Hitting u up to give you my cam feed
Kevin Regan:  Jen Martha! How are you?  My God, I haven't seen you in years
Martha Maher:  I feel great today
Kevin Regan:  I don’t actually need any camel feed. I guess your Aunt Tilly didn't tell you; Lance, our beloved camel, died of camel AIDS over the summer
Kevin Regan: one too many humps!
Martha Maher: Remember.. JuicyTits?!
Kevin Regan: hahahah
Kevin Regan: Actually he got hit by a car
Martha Maher: Just got home and i'm feeling a lil naughty lol...
Kevin Regan: JT? I think I remember him
Kevin Regan: fat kid...with a rat's tail?
Martha Maher: Oh yeah i'm super horny lol! u?
Kevin Regan: no.
Kevin Regan: had my horns removed
Kevin Regan: they were ruining my hats
Martha Maher: Mhhm i love a guy who knows what he wants..wanna get off with me?
Kevin Regan: I wish! I work until 5:30 now. I won't get off for another 45 minutes
Kevin Regan: man time seems to drag
Martha Maher: i wish i could put your face in between my tits!
Kevin Regan: well, this impetigo is pretty contagious
Martha you have a cam?
Kevin Regan: I don't think anyone will ever replace Lance
Kevin Regan:  though I am thinking of getting a sloth
Martha Maher: I have one babe, wanna see what im wearing...
Kevin Regan: you have a sloth?
Martha Maher: Ok! Click here and we'll have a PRIVATE 1on1 chat..There's a few pix of me in there, if you like click the "accept invite" on the left, then register and it'll take you straight to my webcam, I'll be there in a minute...
Kevin Regan: good you dress him up in party wear?

Thursday, November 1, 2012

15 Goals I Set in 2012

So this past year, I thought it would be smart to come up with some goals.  Actual, attainable goals.  Here are fifteen of them and how I made out:

1.  Learn to play guitar (specifically Auld Lang Syne) - I’m not sure what inspired this, maybe watching “When Harry Met Sally” one too many times?  I own a guitar, so I got close to this one.  I also tried to get people teach me how to play it, but alas, in this NEW world of DIY, I really need to just teach myself.  The year isn’t over, so hopefully I can find the time over the next 2 months so I can rock out the traditional New Year’s Eve tune while Dick Clark counts backwards.  I’m kidding!  Dick Clark is totally dead!

2. Read Sherlock Holmes Books – I also should probably learn to write a complete sentence.  But guys, I TOTALLY DID THIS!!!  Not every book, but a huge number of them!  And I love them.  Since I read like 32 short stories and about 5 novels, I should count them as 15 books in my 15th goal.

3. Read the LOTR Trilogy (including The Hobbit) – Did it!  That’s another 4 books friends & neighbors!  (One of my goals should have been to cut down on exclamation points) 

4. Shoot 2 new web series (The Gents & Social Calendar) – Yep…and by that I mean, nope.  Yeah, I totally didn’t do either of these series.  I wrote the “pilot” to Social Calendar and also HATE that title.  I also wrote a second episode, but then stopped.  I’d love to move ahead with this in 2013.  As for The Gents, I still love the idea, but I think it was a funnier bit than the reality would be…maybe something to improv…

5 Write/shoot original short – I did do this.  Kind of.  Actually it was more of a sketch.  Man, I really didn’t do much for filmmaking this year.

6 Write feature length script – um…

7. Write 3 one act plays – well…the year’s not over yet.

8. Write/shoot 3 sketches – OK I did this as stated above!  And by this, I mean 1 out of 3 sketches.  Also, I never edited it.  Jeez.

9. Get more involved with Sketch & Stand Up comedy – I was more involved than in 2011, so that’s something.

10. Learn to drive stick shift – YES!  Well…one out of 365 days.  But I got the basics down.

11. Upload The League, The Clink and re launch The Cheap Seats to iTunes – Nope.  But I have been uploading The Cheap Seats to Funny or Die, so that’s a start.

12. Incorporate – (must make business cards)

13. Web site that ALL my work is on – I am one step closer to this as I have most of the work Joel & I have shot over the past 10 years.

14. Blog 50 times – this is 47…I can hammer out 3 before 2013

15. Read 15 books – I think I actually did this.  May not sound like much, but live my schedule and try to do it.

So what the hell did I do in 2012 that I couldn’t meet all of these goal?  Well…let’s find out:

(next up:  “How I spent my January or the Month Jim Burns finally saw The Big Lebowski”)