Monday, June 16, 2008

Cookie Monster America!

How do you choose the candidate you will vote for to run the free world?

Do vote according to your political party? Do you vote based on certain policies? Do you vote based on who aligns best with your ideological beliefs? Or do you perhaps vote based on who’s spouse make’s the best muffins?

Based on Family Circle Magazine’s “bake-off” it would seem the latter is how many people vote. Apparently the past 4 elections have all been decided by the Presidential candidate’s spouse who “brought” the best bake goods.

Betty Ford meet Betty Crocker.

Now that we are down to two candidate’s in the 2008 Presidential election, that means we are down to two dessert choices:

Michelle Obama, wife of Democratic Illinois Senator Barack Obama, has been stumping for her husband in the kitchen by making some shortbread cookies. Pork barrel appropriations are in short supply, while hints of lemon and orange more then make up for any “deficit” in taste. Along with liberal amounts of almond liqueur Amaretto, these cookies are the “change” this kitchen needs.

The Grand Old Party is putting forth the Grand Old Cookie, oatmeal butterscotch cookies to be precise. Cindy McCain, married to Republican presidential hopeful John McCain, is hoping the palate of America will “stay the course.” These cookies are rumored to be so delicious, that you’ll be signing a petition do drill the Alaskan Pipeline for more.

Readers can vote online at the magazine's website with the results to be published in mid-October, just ahead of the November 4 elections.

So far the oatmeal has the edge over the shortbread…no word on whether Ron Paul’s wife is pulling votes from either cookie. Rumor has it Mrs. Paul was likely to be disqualified as her Fish Sticks did not fit in the official rules of the normal two party contest.

Past winners:

2004 - Teresa Heinz Kerry's pumpkin spice cookies were “swift boated” by Laura Bush's oatmeal chocolate chunk cookies.

2000 - Hanging chads may have cost Tipper Gore's ginger snaps, but the supreme decision saw Laura Bush’s Texas Governor's Mansion Cowboy cookies made with chocolate chips and coconut declared the winner.

1992 & 1996 - Hillary Clinton walked away with the popular vote and all the delegates needed with the same recipe for chocolate chip cookies.

Hopefully the winning party this year is able to improve upon health care, as it seems that diabetics are running this country!

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