Wednesday, July 25, 2007

About Drinking

I don’t get the whole drink Craze.

I understand the “Soft Drink Wars.” Pepsi v Coke, it’s like the Crips versus the Bloods, even the colors match up. People get very defensive of their chosen brand, that is if you have one.
I remember as a kid every time the family would go to the beach, Mom & Dad (really just Mom) would hit up Shop Rite for generic soda, or pop as the Mid-Western states call it. We would get cola, black cherry, orange, cream (f’ing gross!) and root beer. The cooler wouldn’t hold the cola’s or the root beers very long. And luckily Brian would drink that garbage cream soda. After only a couple of days we had depleted the entire stash of quality soda, leaving us with the orange and the black cherry.

All that said, you’d think I’d be a beverage snob.

Up until just under a month ago I drank more than my share of Coke (and more than yours, and hers and his…), but I decided to say goodbye to the “Gang Lifestyle” of the cola wars. So I have been pretty much sticking to water. Regular old fashion water that I pay $1.00 for.
Why do we pay for something that pretty much flows free everywhere from the White House to your friendly neighborhood rest stop? What’s worse are these stupid added flavors.
I understand adding a lemon to water, personally I don’t do it, but when you’re out on the town…you want to do things that you won’t normally do, like put a napkin in your lap. I have ascertained over the years, this is to keep the Caesar dressing in your pubs to an absolute minimum. Hell when I eat at home you’d be lucky if I even wore pants, let alone a napkin on my lap.

A side note here, when I say “You’d be lucky,” I obviously am referring to my lovely wife…who I’m sure you can all tell, is anything but lucky.

Anywho (people who say “anywho” suck), I bought water I thought was a water from a vending machine today. When I took it from the return in the machine I realized it was fizzing. “What the?” Apparently the water, I thought was water had some sort of grape flavoring in it. My first question would be, “Why?” If I wanted grape juice don’t you think I would have bought grape juice? Somewhere the powers that be decided they knew better than me or my taste buds what I wanted. I was miffed (people who say “miffed” are far worse off than people who say “anywho”). I decided to try the drink anyway. It did not go over well.

I am now drinking a bottled water I left in my extremely hot car for over an hour. Sometimes I think I should’ve just kept drinking Coke.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I say 'anywho' all the time.

Now I'm miffed.