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| "I'll put ALL of the Lions on Ice!" |
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| "...and don't even THINK about asking me to bring flowers to your gay wedding!" |
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| "Why so Serious...about A.I.D.S. medication?" |
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Batman's Shitty Rogues Gallery
I hate that EVERYDAY I turn on the TV or log on to my computer, I am faced with a shitty version of a Batman Villain.
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
No One Will Remember The Rain
"If the rain comes, they run and hide their heads..."
-RAIN by The Beatles
"The show must go on, the show must go on."
-THE SHOW MUST GO ON by Queen
If you had to pick between one of these two sets of lyrics, which would you be?
Because I just spent a weekend with a whole lot of people who are DEFINITELY the latter.
*****
I'm not a poet. Nor am I very lyrical.
I sometimes slave over words to make a joke work perfectly, but that's likely the limit of my art.
I respect poets and actors, musicians and artists like crazy! I'm jealous of their abilities.
So here's an ode to a couple of those artists:
*****
It was the wedding of an actor and a singer...or better put, a pair of incredible people.
We all checked our weather apps and looked at the clouds to see if they were in sync or if maybe, just maybe our cell phones were wrong. Quickly refreshing the radar showed a storm moving closer and closer. Surely this wouldn't happen on the day of an outdoor wedding.
The show must go on.
The bride was off with her ladies in waiting getting the finishing touches put on their make up and hair.
The groom was showered and dressed, hoping that someone among his court knew how to tie a bow-tie.
The show must go on.
Outside, helping set up cocktail tables and lights, a drop of water fell upon my cheek.
Sweat from my hair, no doubt. It was after all uncommonly humid for a double digit day in September.
The show must go on.
Coolers are lowered on a pulley system to make sure the bar is amply stocked for the evening's festivities.
The show must go on.
The bride returns with her party, all looking more beautiful than when they left (if that's possible). They adjourn to the house to put on their attire.
The show must go on.
Someone is summoned to help the groom complete his ensemble. THIS crisis, averted.
The show must go on.
I ask the groom, "What time pictures are to take place?"
He informs me, "4:30 pm."
I counter by informing him, "It is now 4:35 pm."
The show must go on.
I text the photographer to let him know the wedding party will be late. I'm sure that's nothing new to him.
He informs me it is about to start raining.
The show must go on.
The bride calls for her groom. She wants him to see her before anyone else does.
This is not traditional.
This is not a traditional bride.
This is not a traditional groom.
This is not a traditional couple.
Time stops. For a moment. As it should.
The groom exits his home with his bride. They aren't married yet. It doesn't matter. The way he looks at her. She is his world. There is no rain.
Time continues to stand still until they leave to take photos.
Once they are gone, "the help," who will later transform into attendees...or better put, the couple's friends, kick into high gear.
Whether (weather) we like it or not, the rain is coming.
Some quick decisions are made and then plans implemented.
The show must go on.
A room is transformed to allow guests and food alike to stay dry.
The show must go on.
Guests start arriving for the cocktail hour. As does the rain. Umbrellas are acquired and handed out to those in need.
The show must go on.
Plans are made. Scrapped. Reformed based on "the possible" becoming "the reality."
The show must go on.
The couple returns with their wedding party. They bring with them heavier rains.
The dark clouds above are enough to ruin a dull Saturday, let alone an outdoor wedding nuptials...
The show must go on.
...but, no one is saddened.
The joyousness that is felt from all in attendance brings a sunshine that could burn to your very soul.
Men dressed in their best suits. Ladies in their fanciest dresses.
Coiffed hair and make up. High heels and opened toed shoes.
The heavy fall of the early autumn weather can do nothing to dampen the spirit of this day.
A bride and a groom
An actor and a singer
A woman and a man
Two people joined into one union, while some of their closest friends look on with love in their hearts and tears in their eyes.
Like the powerful performance in a musical or the exhilaration of a rock concert, these performers shined brighter than any day we've seen this summer.
This was a show for the ages that people will talk about for years. And no one will remember the rain.
-RAIN by The Beatles
"The show must go on, the show must go on."
-THE SHOW MUST GO ON by Queen
If you had to pick between one of these two sets of lyrics, which would you be?
Because I just spent a weekend with a whole lot of people who are DEFINITELY the latter.
*****
I'm not a poet. Nor am I very lyrical.
I sometimes slave over words to make a joke work perfectly, but that's likely the limit of my art.
I respect poets and actors, musicians and artists like crazy! I'm jealous of their abilities.
So here's an ode to a couple of those artists:
*****
It was the wedding of an actor and a singer...or better put, a pair of incredible people.
We all checked our weather apps and looked at the clouds to see if they were in sync or if maybe, just maybe our cell phones were wrong. Quickly refreshing the radar showed a storm moving closer and closer. Surely this wouldn't happen on the day of an outdoor wedding.
The show must go on.
The bride was off with her ladies in waiting getting the finishing touches put on their make up and hair.
The groom was showered and dressed, hoping that someone among his court knew how to tie a bow-tie.
The show must go on.
Outside, helping set up cocktail tables and lights, a drop of water fell upon my cheek.
Sweat from my hair, no doubt. It was after all uncommonly humid for a double digit day in September.
The show must go on.
Coolers are lowered on a pulley system to make sure the bar is amply stocked for the evening's festivities.
The show must go on.
The bride returns with her party, all looking more beautiful than when they left (if that's possible). They adjourn to the house to put on their attire.
The show must go on.
Someone is summoned to help the groom complete his ensemble. THIS crisis, averted.
The show must go on.
I ask the groom, "What time pictures are to take place?"
He informs me, "4:30 pm."
I counter by informing him, "It is now 4:35 pm."
The show must go on.
I text the photographer to let him know the wedding party will be late. I'm sure that's nothing new to him.
He informs me it is about to start raining.
The show must go on.
The bride calls for her groom. She wants him to see her before anyone else does.
This is not traditional.
This is not a traditional bride.
This is not a traditional groom.
This is not a traditional couple.
Time stops. For a moment. As it should.
The groom exits his home with his bride. They aren't married yet. It doesn't matter. The way he looks at her. She is his world. There is no rain.
Time continues to stand still until they leave to take photos.
Once they are gone, "the help," who will later transform into attendees...or better put, the couple's friends, kick into high gear.
Whether (weather) we like it or not, the rain is coming.
Some quick decisions are made and then plans implemented.
The show must go on.
A room is transformed to allow guests and food alike to stay dry.
The show must go on.
Guests start arriving for the cocktail hour. As does the rain. Umbrellas are acquired and handed out to those in need.
The show must go on.
Plans are made. Scrapped. Reformed based on "the possible" becoming "the reality."
The show must go on.
The couple returns with their wedding party. They bring with them heavier rains.
The dark clouds above are enough to ruin a dull Saturday, let alone an outdoor wedding nuptials...
The show must go on.
...but, no one is saddened.
The joyousness that is felt from all in attendance brings a sunshine that could burn to your very soul.
Men dressed in their best suits. Ladies in their fanciest dresses.
Coiffed hair and make up. High heels and opened toed shoes.
The heavy fall of the early autumn weather can do nothing to dampen the spirit of this day.
A bride and a groom
An actor and a singer
A woman and a man
Two people joined into one union, while some of their closest friends look on with love in their hearts and tears in their eyes.
Like the powerful performance in a musical or the exhilaration of a rock concert, these performers shined brighter than any day we've seen this summer.
This was a show for the ages that people will talk about for years. And no one will remember the rain.
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