Phones with Options...

I find it immensely troubling that here we are-3 days after the iPhone has hit the shelves yet we still need instructions on how to leave a message for a person. Do I really, in the year 2007, need a recorded voice telling me that if I want to leave a message wait for the beep? It truly is the equivalent of telling an adult to look both ways before crossing the street. They know. Or at least they should know. I am 31, and when I leave my parent’s my mother still says, “Drive carefully.” As if I have it in the back of my mind to haul ass across the neighbor’s front yard.

Police Officer: “Son, why were you driving on that front lawn?”
Me: “Well Officer, my Mom didn’t tell me I couldn’t.”
Police Officer: “Fair enough. Wanna borrow my gun? Go shoot some kids?
Me: “Do I!”

My favorite part of voice mail instructions is when the woman (it’s always a woman) says, “After you leave your message hang up.” Really? Then what? Hello? Lady, where did you go? I have to go to the can and I need instructions. What should I do?

“For more options, press 5.” More options for what? I can either leave a message, or not leave a message. There are no other options!

This entire post will be lost on Joel, who I call a Live Communicator. He never leaves a message. Of course now that he has an iPhone I suppose he does have other options.