Thursday, May 8, 2014

The Many Faces Of A Prince

Us Weekly, the bastion of quality reporting through out the land, recently came under fire when they altered a photo of the boy Prince, 9 month old Prince George. 

The whole story on PAGE SIX


A spokes person for the magazine (I know, there are still magazines, can you believe it?!?) stated:


“The original image used for the Prince George cover was dark and bluish in tone and needed to be given an overall color shift for printing purposes. By no means did we go in and alter the color of his eyes or cheeks in this process.”


Why not? I say go to fucking town! So, here are 15 photos of what US Weekly could have done to the boy Royal of "Boyal" (Trademarked)


1.
Boy George as K.D. Lang. "Constant Craving" a binky.

2.
A. Raggedy Anne
B. Raggedy Andy
C. Raggedy Conan O'Brien

3.
A bouncer at a lesbian bar in Philly called "Sisters." 
I once used the bathroom there. 

4.
Lon Chaney Jr. AKA The Wolfman, jack! Not to be confused with Wolfman Jack...who also kind of looked like this.

5.
Rod Blagojevich. US royalty. Note the stripes ala a prison jumpsuit.

6.
A High School Football coach. "We're going all to States this year boys!"

7. 
The Heat Miser.
 "I'm mister Heat Miser, I'm mister warm...ba-da-da-da"

8.
Balthazar Getty...er, wait, maybe this one was K.D. Lang. 
Oh well. 
It doesn't really matter.

9. 
Cesar Romaro.
That guy couldn't be bothered to shave the mustache to play the Joker. Fuck man, Ledger actually died that's how dedicated he was.

10.
 Elton John. I know. It's a wig. But come on, the guy wrote Tiny Dancer. Cut him a break.

11.
Either the dude who works on my car or one time WWF Superstar, the Honkey Tonk Man (in 2014). Possibly the same person...

12.
Toronto Mayor, Rob Ford.
Yeah he's a crack addict, but he's fucking adorable!

13.
A Tennis Ball.

14.
Bieber. Fuck him.

15.
Lil' Glenn Danzig.
We Are 138, motherfuckers!

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