SPAM Can Lead To A Huge Change In Your Life!

I get SPAM all the time.  I seldom read it let alone respond to it...

This was a letter I received today:

This is the Most Effective And Safest Way To Enlarge Your Manhood
Get Incredible Gains Even While You SLEEP!
Gains Of 3-4 Inches Are Not Uncommonm, Try for yourself Risk Free 100% Guaranteed to Work

CLICK BELOW NOW AND GET THE SIZE YOU AND YOUR PARTNER WILL BE VERY SATISFIED WITH

This is my response:

I tried your product as a goof.  I figured it’s RISK free so what could the downside be?  Nothing happened the first 2 days.  I was about to give up but tried it one last time before going to bed. 

I awoke to find an enormous girthy cock!  For a minute I felt like I was living in “The Emperor’s New Clothes.”  In this version of the story, I was the Emperor and the new clothes were my huge manhood. 

I was all set to write you an email expressing my thanks when I realized I couldn’t get out of bed.  See, I’m an impatient man.  After the first day of trying your methods, I saw no results within the first 20 minutes.  So I upped the required “dosage” by 500%.  Then the next day I tripled that.  As stated above, I was about to give up on the third day when I decided to throw caution in the wind and increase the dosage another 10 times. 

Have you ever been in the woods and gotten tired?  So you decide to lie down and take a nap?  Then you wake up and find a tree has fallen on you across your body pinning you to the grown?  No one heard it fall, because no one was around. Except you.  But you were asleep.  And even if you weren’t, you’re walkman was blasting Lionel Richie so you wouldn’t have been able to hear it anyway.  That’s how I felt when I awoke, minus the wet leaves on my back. 

I now lie pinned to my bed by my new penile trunk wondering if I’ll ever find a woman who will appreciate my endowment. 

Do you sell a product that increases the size of a woman’s vagina to volcano opening proportions?  If so, please send a list of customers.  Love of Lionel Richie a plus.  No fatties!